Daddy’s Girl
Psalm 2:7
“I will proclaim the LORD's decree: He said to me, "You are my son; today I
have become your father.”
I tried for so many years to be this perfect Christian because I thought that
is what God wanted from me. I struggle so hard to do it my way and with
my strength. And because I was trying to do it on my own, I kept failing, I
kept falling in the same trap over and over again. So, I thought to myself, I'm
not going to be a fake Christian I tried it and I failed, God deserved better
than me, so I simply gave up trying and stopped going to church.
Our past impacts who we are even if we don't realize it. My father in his
love for wanting me to be the best I can be, he created these high
expectations of me that I couldn't reach. It came to a point that I felt I
couldn't do anything right. I hardly heard my father give me praise. Most of
the time when I interacted with my father is because I was being punished
for something I did wrong or didn't do. That is when my relationship
changed with my dad, it went from me being daddy's girl to just being his
daughter. There's an intimacy and a strong feeling of protection that only
comes from being Daddy's little girl and I no longer felt like daddy's little
girl, I had become Daddy's disappointment.
My father never told me to my face that he was disappointed in who I was,
but he also never told me he was proud of me. Not even on my high school
graduation do I remember my father telling me he was proud. This is why
my relationship with God was so messed up. The same way I was given
expectations for my daily living I was also taught about all these
expectations that I needed to meet in order to please my God, to be this
perfect child worthy of God's love. I held on to these unrealistic
expectations and set the bar so high that there was no way I could reach
them. Since I never found a way that I could please my earthly father, how
could I find favor with the maker of heaven and earth? I had set myself for
failure from the beginning.
I saw my heavenly father like I view my earthly father. What I really needed
to learn was to not just see God as this great powerful God. I needed to
see him as our loving heavenly father. When I learned there was a
difference and I applied it, my relationship with God changed.
God is our heavenly father and to him we are the most precious thing in the
world. He chooses to not duel on our imperfections and shortcomings but
he rejoices in us simply trying to do our best. He's not looking for perfection
from us, but a heart that longs to give all we have to him. I read 2
Corinthians 12 so many times where it says "My grace is sufficient for you,
for my power is made perfect in weakness." I took it as God's grace is big
to forgive my shortcomings because he knew I would fail. But what I didn't
understand was that it was in my weaknesses that he would reveal his
power. I had missed that revelation back then. Only now do I truly
understand that verse,
My relationship with my heavenly father grew in a process that I had to go
through on my own. We tend to view God with the same glasses we view
our fathers. But our fathers are not perfect, they are human and make
mistakes. In order for me to be able to draw closer to God. God had to heal
my heart in order for me to accept his unconditional love. It was a long
process, it took years of God's loving patience and grace to soften my heart
again. I learned that having unresolved issues in my heart even though I
had buried them deep down, would hinder my spiritual growth and it was
the reason why I was feeling like God was at arm's length from me. Once
he softened and opened my heart to view my father as the human man he
was. A man who was trying the best he could as a dad, I was able to
forgive past hurts. God is so good that while he was working on my heart
he was also working on my father's heart. The day I thought would never
come, came and my father and I had a heart-to-heart talk. God restored us
relationship and now we have a great father and daughter relationship.
You see there is no secret to becoming Daddy's little girl. Because we
already are, it is up to us to accept it wholeheartedly. I had to in my heart
accept the fact that God's love for me had no strings attached. There was
nothing I had to do to earn his love.
When you know your Daddy's girl there's a feeling of entitlement. You know
your daddy got your back no matter what. You know if your daddy sees one
tear fall from your eyes, whoever made you cry better start running
because daddy is going to get them and make THEM cry. When your
daddy's girl, the whole world around you could be crumbling but you won't
fear because you know your daddy has the biggest arms in the world and
he will protect you from any harm. To a father, that little girl is his world and
to that little girl, her daddy is her world. This is what being a daddy's girl
means.
Now that I no longer feel this weight of expectations on my shoulder, I feel
free to praise, free to raise my hands to the sky and say Daddy I love you,
and I can receive his love in return without fear.
Lord, I ask today that you search our hearts, to take away everything that is
hindering our spiritual growth. I ask you Lord, to heal those wounded parts
that no one sees but you. I ask that every person that reads this feels your
loving embrace. That they know that they are loved by you and that there's no string attached to that love. -Amen
